How To 'Drop Anchor' and Ride Out the Storm

A strategy for moments of intense emotion

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This January has been heavy. Many of us are struggling with emotions and grappling with how to keep moving forward.

I thought now would be a good time to share one of my favorite strategies for moments of intense emotion. This technique is called “Dropping Anchor” and it is a popular strategy from Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT). It has been written about extensively by psychologist, author, and ACT expert Russ Harris.

This technique helps by encouraging cognitive defusion, which you can read more about here. Defusion is a process that helps put space between ourselves and our thoughts. It allows us to observe and label our internal experiences and to see them as a product of our busy minds.

This is different from how we usually relate to thoughts and feelings, which is to become absorbed in them (like our mind is a movie and we are the main character) and take them as fact. This is called cognitive fusion.

Sometimes we find ourselves very fused with a thought or feeling. Think of a time when you felt flooded with emotion. You likely felt the impact of the emotion as changes in your body, like a sensation of nausea, heat in your cheeks, or a tightness in your chest. You may have experienced a panic attack, an emotional flashback, or felt completely overwhelmed by emotion. In these moments, anything that anyone says to you is likely to go unheard or worse, make you spiral further into the emotion. You are likely experiencing an onslaught of uncomfortable thoughts, feelings, sensations, and perhaps memories and other associations in this moment.*

These are moments for dropping anchor. The term “dropping anchor” alludes to the fact that when a boat is in a storm, it does not try to steer it’s way out. It does not battle against the wind, rain, and waves. Instead, it literally drops it’s anchor. The only strategy is to hold on tight and wait out the storm.

Of course, anyone on the boat is still getting pummeled by rain. Similarly, when we are dropping anchor, we are not likely to feel soothed or relieved of the painful emotion in the moment. We are simply trying not to make it worse, and perhaps not be tossed about by the waves quite so much.

However, by not responding or fighting, the emotional storm will pass more quickly. Ironically, it is often the ways that we try to escape painful emotions that actually keeps us stuck in them.

Dropping anchor can look many different ways. A simple acronym to guide you is ACE which stands for:

• Acknowledge thoughts, feelings, and sensations

• Come into your body

• Engage in what you are doing

Let’s walk through each part of the exercise.

Acknowledge: Observe and label the thoughts, feelings, and sensations that you are experiencing. Instead of saying “I am scared” or “I am a failure” you might try to begin with “I am noticing a thought that…(I am a failure)” or “I am noticing that I am feeling scared.” Really try to stay out of the narrative that may be running through your mind, the story that is attempting to make meaning out of what is occurring. Instead, simply label the thoughts, feelings, and sensations.

Come into your body: Next, turn your attention to your body and how it feels to take up some space in this present moment. Push your feet into the floor and notice that feeling. Move gently in your chair. Take some deep breaths. Shrug your shoulders up and down. See how we are trying to move our attention out of our head and into our body? We also want to notice that we have some control over this body.

Engage in what you are doing: In this last step, we want to turn our attention outward. We want to notice the space around us. We want to notice how we can move in that space. We can also choose to re-engage with whatever it is that we need to do next, no matter how big or small that next action may be.

Be wary that you are not using dropping anchor as distraction. This strategy is grounded in mindfulness, which is always about bringing attention to the present moment, non-judgmentally, and accepting what we notice. Distraction involves avoiding what is happening in the present moment. Although it may be effective sometimes, our goal with this technique is to experience what it is like to stay with discomfort and watch it recede (and learn that you can survive it).

Also, do not mistake this strategy for a relaxation or stress-reduction technique. Although these would be nice side effects, it is not the intention.

If you are a cynical sally like me, you may be wondering how something so simple can be helpful in the face of paralyzing emotions. The actions may seem simple, but remember- we are practicing cognitive defusion. Defusion helps us to untangle ourselves from the unhelpful stories that tend to keep us stuck in painful patterns of thoughts, feelings, and actions. And that can be pretty life-changing.

(*Note: If you are experiencing symptoms associated with PTSD, then any mindfulness technique may seem daunting. Whereas this is an appropriate skill to use when experiencing trauma symptoms, it may require more practice. I encourage you to listen to your gut and if this sounds like something that may overwhelm you, then perhaps try it first with the guidance of a therapist. )

I have recorded a short audio of me guiding you through the steps of dropping anchor (please excuse the minor background noise!)

Dropping Anchor:

This is a 4 minute version, but you can make the practice shorter or longer depending on your needs. Check out Act Mindfully by Russ Harris to access a treasure trove of guided audios, including various versions of this exercise.

I hope you can add “dropping anchor” to your tool kit. If you find it helpful, you might want to check out my articles about disengaging from unhealthy thoughts Part 1 and Part 2.

Struggling after the inauguration?

Here is an article I wrote for the Anxiety and Depression Association of America called The Impact of Post-Election Uncertainty on Women’s Mental Health.

I personally appreciated this recent post by Lisa Olivera, whose writing is always so comforting to me: Yes, fear. Yes, rage. Yes, grief.

In the comments, I would love if you would share what you are finding helpful for coping with how january this long January has been. What are the glimmers? What has brought a smile to your face? How are you taking care of yourself? What are you reading or listening to?

If this article was helpful to you, please like, comment, and SHARE. It helps so much.

Disclosure: Dr. Amber_Writes is a newsletter designed to be informational, entertaining, and engaging. It is not therapy. Following this newsletter does not establish a therapeutic relationship with me. Dr. Amber_Writes, and other written communication by Amber Groomes on Substack, is not a substitute for treatment, diagnosis, or consultation with a licensed mental health professional. I assume no liability for any action taken in reliance on my writing here at Dr. Amber_Writes.