I don't mind imaginary play, so long as my children let me decide what my own character is going to do next, which they often don't. It quickly becomes a bit tedious when they're mapping out all the things my character is and isn't allowed to do...
I do a lot of building with my older two. We have a storage tower in our living room with four big boxes, each containing a different building toy (lego, duplo, magnatiles and sticklebricks.) Often, if the imaginative play with their figures is getting to the point I've described above, I'll suggest we build a house for the characters to live in or a play centre for them etc - the kids love it and we treat it as an extension of our game without me showing outright that I'm getting bored. Sometimes while they're busy having the figures talk to one another I'll just continue building whilst making enthusiastic statements now and then, which they're happy with
That was a long tangent I didn't know I was going to go on, but to shorten it - I do think play is important, but I think we need to find ways that make it bearable for us if the games they want us to play don't always come naturally. Something I have on my side also is having two boys that are only 19 months apart. We'll see how easily I can get out of it when the youngest reaches this stage
Yes, my daughter only wants my character to say and do what she decides 😂 it adds to the frustration! I much prefer building or arts and crafts! Off topic, but we have been watching the new Bluey episodes here in the states (not sure where you are located) and that show sets the bar high for parents when it comes to imaginary play! I love it though.
I'm in the UK, and Bluey is very much a thing here. They really do set the bar very high, though I do appreciate that Chili is a bit less into the play than Bandit is, I feel they really highlight the 'fun dad'/'mum that has to get everything else done for the kids so has less time/desire to be fun' dynamic well
Thank you! I'm glad you found it to be thorough, I really struggle with knowing when I've provided enough to make it "worth" publishing but not so much that it's boring or clinical. If I had to guess I would have said this was too basic but I went with it anyway. So that feedback is really helpful!
My 4-year-old granddaughter adores the "imaginary" playtime we do. She doesn't have siblings. l am genuinely interested in seeing the scenarios she creates, which often have to do with situations in her real life she's working out. As her grandmother, l want to be available for the type of fun she wants to engage in (even if it is sometimes boring). As a mom of three, l didn't have as much time to spend on this and am thrilled to get to "have another chance" with my granddaughter. I feel like it's a gift for both of us to spend time together this way.
Grandparents are so precious. It is wonderful that she has this relationship with you, and that you are so genuinely interested and appreciative of her play! I agree that kids do use play to make sense of the things they are experiencing in life, and to have a loving adult witness that is a gift.
I’m cautious of any hard-and-fast yes/no rules when it comes to parenting, and parents digging their heels on their stance being the best stance, simply to hold their ground. I always found the repetitive play stuff kinda boring (like pretending to go night-night over and over), but my kiddo is an only child so I endured it for her. And yet I still use lots of imaginary play with her (making a voice for the cat that cracks her up), and I’ll miss that when she’s too tween to appreciate it.
Right, I feel like there are so many opportunities to engage in imagination that does not have to be sitting on the floor playing with toys. My youngest LOVES that type of play and tries to get us to play with her in basically every free moment. Sometimes I say yes, and lots of times I say no. But all the time, I am open to being playful and engaging in fantasy with her- and that can happen just about anywhere. I just hate the idea of parents being shamed over something like this, when really there is so much room for flexibility.
I don't mind imaginary play, so long as my children let me decide what my own character is going to do next, which they often don't. It quickly becomes a bit tedious when they're mapping out all the things my character is and isn't allowed to do...
I do a lot of building with my older two. We have a storage tower in our living room with four big boxes, each containing a different building toy (lego, duplo, magnatiles and sticklebricks.) Often, if the imaginative play with their figures is getting to the point I've described above, I'll suggest we build a house for the characters to live in or a play centre for them etc - the kids love it and we treat it as an extension of our game without me showing outright that I'm getting bored. Sometimes while they're busy having the figures talk to one another I'll just continue building whilst making enthusiastic statements now and then, which they're happy with
That was a long tangent I didn't know I was going to go on, but to shorten it - I do think play is important, but I think we need to find ways that make it bearable for us if the games they want us to play don't always come naturally. Something I have on my side also is having two boys that are only 19 months apart. We'll see how easily I can get out of it when the youngest reaches this stage
Yes, my daughter only wants my character to say and do what she decides 😂 it adds to the frustration! I much prefer building or arts and crafts! Off topic, but we have been watching the new Bluey episodes here in the states (not sure where you are located) and that show sets the bar high for parents when it comes to imaginary play! I love it though.
I'm in the UK, and Bluey is very much a thing here. They really do set the bar very high, though I do appreciate that Chili is a bit less into the play than Bandit is, I feel they really highlight the 'fun dad'/'mum that has to get everything else done for the kids so has less time/desire to be fun' dynamic well
So glad you wrote this nuanced, fleshed out piece. 🙏🏼🙏🏼
Thank you! I'm glad you found it to be thorough, I really struggle with knowing when I've provided enough to make it "worth" publishing but not so much that it's boring or clinical. If I had to guess I would have said this was too basic but I went with it anyway. So that feedback is really helpful!
My 4-year-old granddaughter adores the "imaginary" playtime we do. She doesn't have siblings. l am genuinely interested in seeing the scenarios she creates, which often have to do with situations in her real life she's working out. As her grandmother, l want to be available for the type of fun she wants to engage in (even if it is sometimes boring). As a mom of three, l didn't have as much time to spend on this and am thrilled to get to "have another chance" with my granddaughter. I feel like it's a gift for both of us to spend time together this way.
Grandparents are so precious. It is wonderful that she has this relationship with you, and that you are so genuinely interested and appreciative of her play! I agree that kids do use play to make sense of the things they are experiencing in life, and to have a loving adult witness that is a gift.
I’m cautious of any hard-and-fast yes/no rules when it comes to parenting, and parents digging their heels on their stance being the best stance, simply to hold their ground. I always found the repetitive play stuff kinda boring (like pretending to go night-night over and over), but my kiddo is an only child so I endured it for her. And yet I still use lots of imaginary play with her (making a voice for the cat that cracks her up), and I’ll miss that when she’s too tween to appreciate it.
Right, I feel like there are so many opportunities to engage in imagination that does not have to be sitting on the floor playing with toys. My youngest LOVES that type of play and tries to get us to play with her in basically every free moment. Sometimes I say yes, and lots of times I say no. But all the time, I am open to being playful and engaging in fantasy with her- and that can happen just about anywhere. I just hate the idea of parents being shamed over something like this, when really there is so much room for flexibility.